Hi, I’m Marcus Neo,
I’m founder of Marcus Social, dating coach for men and behavioral change consultant.
Tens and hundreds of clients, readers have used my to learn to use psychology and systems to better their dating and relationship lives. I’ve also been featured in multiple popular media platforms such as The Yellow Pages and GoodMenProject. I write no B.S, psychologically validated dating, relationships advice and step by step systems that work in the real world.
I know you have a lot of choices in who you read, but, hear me out
I started my journey of personal growth 6 years ago when I broke off with my last relationships. I left broken hearted after a girl broke off with me that left me in a depressive state that lasted close to 2 years.
Imagine that! It took me 2 long years to get back on my feet. I was also someone who once considered sex, dating and relationships as an area of life that is left purely to luck and fate.
I started my foray into the PUA community as a young budding pick up artist when I chanced upon the book ‘The Game’ a few years ago.
I was desperate and wanted more control over my dating life. That was when I made a decision to learn how this dating thing works. I was obsessed with the idea you could better your social skills, your emotional life and are able to lead a much more empowered dating life. These experiences fueled me on a journey of partial obsession, lots of pain, lots of growth, and insights into my own emotional realities.
Through 6 years of successes and failures, I cultivated myself to go from a broken hearted victim to an empowered individual. Since then, my ideas around dating and relationships has evolved from pick up artist literature to psychological researched concepts.
From depression to entrepreneur, dating coach, helping hundreds
Over the years, I found out that many people are taking the un-informed approach towards their dating life, or their life in general.
That’s because most of them are applying what they read and hear on, mainstream media, YouTube and books such as like ‘The Game’. The obsession with pick up lines doesn’t actually work. You see guys starting out with this going for crazy spins in the clubs. Whilst this is great for YouTube, it paints an unrealistic picture on how social interactions actually work.
Unfortunately, a lot of these strategies aren’t researched or sustainable.
William James, a famous psychologist, said that life has to spent on something that outlasts it. I started Marcus Social to document years of insights of my own psychological growth, and to help others.
I started off my business as a dating coach. Successfully helping tens and hundreds of clients and readers achieve their dating goals. However, I figured, you can also use similar principles in psychology to focus on what actually works not just for dating and relationships, but all aspects of life: money, personal finance, business, fitness and more.
Why this material works
Over years, I started working closely with ambitious students, working professionals, executives, CEOs to go from rock bottom confidence to taking their first steps towards a lifetime of growth using the psychologically researched strategies.
You can read about their success stories.
Or, you can read what one client said about me:
‘Marcus’s approach and openness is calibrated. The difference is that he’s calibrated to Singaporean girls and he knows his stuff. Marcus is also very willing to share. What I learned is that you can use a simple line such as going up as saying Hi can be useful. I tuned my approach from aggressive to something more calibrated, laidback and chill. I saw a Korean lady, I used the more low key approach, got her to open up and that was a huge improvement.’
I take a completely different approach from most ‘experts’ out there
1. Let me ask you, how many people sign up for expensive self help seminars or pay some shady life coach and go home, come back a year later with nothing much to show in their life? Well, that’s the majority.
Firstly, the advice I put out on this site is backed up by decades of psychological research and I don’t make claims that can’t be backed up by data. You’ll find multiple citations on my articles, throughout my articles. I also use my own first-hand real life stories as examples and case studies. I don’t write advice that I don’t use in may own life, or haven’t tested.
2. The idea of self development stems from the idea that you’re dissatisfied with certain circumstances in your life. However, there’s a problem there. How can you ever feel ‘enough’, if you’re always trying to improve yourself? Isn’t that the point of self development: to feel enough?
The majority of experts out there claims you can you what you want in money, relationships without facing any rejection. Or they shell out slipshod advice such as ‘just be positive’. However, tons of research shows that rejection, pain, loss, grief, negative emotions are normal and healthy. They can even be useful and helpful to an extent. The key here isn’t to deny nor suppress negative emotions, but to accept them, and eventually integrate them in our lives.
3. Stop memorizing lines and techniques. Learn how to connect emotionally with yourself and others. Pursue your people from a standpoint of vulnerability, courage and boldness. Humble yourself to the world. Failure and rejection are inevitable; it’s how you deal with it that matters. If you’re going to treat everyone else an object, then, needless to say, you’re not going to get far in your dating life.
Here’s the truth about doing it yourself: Willpower is limited
I hated the conventional advice out there:
- Just get a practical degree and you’ll be set for life!
- Just work harder!
- Just be confident!
- Just be ‘positive’
You see, life isn’t that simple. You can have the best lifestyle or job and still NOT be good successful in your dating life.
Firstly, the majority of the advice out there aren’t backed by psychological research.
Ever been to an expensive self help seminar, felt good for 3 days, and you return to your old self after three days?
When it comes to social skillsets, dating and relationships, money, the upsides of having a coach is that you get a third person’s perspective on your sticking points. Psychological research shows that coaching keeps you accountable and give you the desired push when required.
This is why the best people in the world often hire personal trainers, psychologists and business consultants to help with all areas of their life. They could have read up on psychology on their own. They could have gone to the gym on their own. They could have read all the business theory on their own.
Why do they still pay, some times, top dollar for these services?
That’s because you and I are all flawed and require a 3rd person’s perspective. You can say otherwise, however, the psycholoical research shows otherwise. You and I are cognitive misers, and our willpower is limited. You are a lot more influenced by your environment than you think that you are.
Belief #1) I’m Going to Figure it Out by Myself
There’s a common mindset that applies to many areas of our life. It’s the belief that if you just ‘tried harder’, or will yourself through pain, you’re going to succeed.
However, how are you going to succeed if all your friends are staying at home on Friday night playing dota?
If you got a community, like minded individuals to talke to, that’s where going out becomes an automatic event in your life, as oppose to something that you dread and have to ‘push through’. When I invested in my own mentor, I had people to discuss sensitive topics with, I had people to hone my social skills with, I had people to keep me back on track when I fall behind.
Belief #2) I’m Not Ready
Here’s the truth: the stars will never align for you to do something about your life. This is why I don’t pay any attention to new year resolutions.
There’s no best day or time, to get fit or eat healthy, just like there’s no right time to start a business. There’s no right time to take action in any area of your life.
Belief #3) ‘My friends think it’s a waste of money’
Your friends aren’t you. It’s your life. Right?
Belief #4) What if the Advice Isn’t for Me?
So, what if your coaching programs aren’t suited for me?
There are heaps of advice sites out there, if not hundreds. These sites all have their unique stories and philosophies. I’m sure when you read these sites, there will be both advice that you agree and disagree with. However, just because one paragraph of advice isn’t suited to you, doesn’t mean that all of the advice is bad or isn’t for you. You’re just be finding a way out to not take action.
Up till today, I constantly rely on different resources, parts of strategies from different people who I don’t completely agree to help better my life.
About the Founder:
Marcus graduated with a Diploma of Economics from the University of London. After a short summer stint at the University of Berkeley where he studied psychology, he switched to a BSc Psychology degree at the Singapore University of Social Sciences.
Lastly, if you aren’t going to be a client, feel free to read the free material I put out on the site, subscribe to my newsletter, and leave a comment or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.