‘Good game don’t seem like game, and it’s often monotonous and boring.’ – Todd Valentine ‘Judge someone’s ‘game’ by their average set.’ – Todd Valentine Those lines are music to Read More
Hi, I’m Marcus.
It’s been 6 years since I picked up the book ‘The Game’ by Neil Strauss in 2011.
I started my journey of personal growth 6 years ago when I got off a horrendous break up. That me led down a fascinating journey of behavioral change, entrepreneurship and world travel. On this blog I write about psychology and behaviorual change. Feel free to leave comments and feedback. I read everything.
Through 6 years of successes and failures, I cultivated myself to be socially competent, anywhere around the world. Since then, my ideas around dating and relationships has evolved from pick up artist literature to psychological researched concepts.
These days, I see myself as an entrepreneur, writer, dating, relationship and life coach.
Most importantly of all, I went from a broken hearted victim to an empowered human being.
The Story: From Heartbreak to Endless Dates to Dating & Life Coach
I started my foray into the PUA community as a young budding pick up artist when I chanced upon the book The Game a few years ago.
I was once left broken hearted after a girl broke off with me whilst I was overseas on a trip. That left me in a heartbreak that lasted close to 2 years. Imagine that! It took me 2 long years to get back on my feet. I was also someone who once considered sex, dating and relationships as an area of life that is left purely to luck and fate. The two girlfriends I dated during my teenage years was considered to be “lucky”.
I was desperate and wanted more control over my dating life. Well, I also wanted the hottest, the most popular girls. Through these painful experiences, I made a decision to cultivated myself to someone that didn’t want to feel stuck in relationships. I grew obsessed with the idea you could better your social skills, your emotional life, and are able to lead a much more empowered dating life.
These experiences fueled me on a journey of partial obsession, lots of pain, lots of growth, and insights into my own emotional realities. You can read my dabbles into the pick up artist community. These days, I focus on my own psychology and the psychology of others.
The latter has paid off in the long run.
I started Marcus Social and a couple of other blogs to compile 6 years of insights of my own psychological growth. Writing is a two-way thing, kind of a like a romantic affair. I’m writing for me, and at the same time, I am writing for you.
Getting You from Zero to Hero
For the last the 6 years, I spent my meeting, dating and seducing girls from all over the world. Whilst it’s fun going out on dates after dates, falling in love in foreign cultures and all that good stuff, I realized I there was a lack of meaning in my life.
William James, a famous psychologist, said that life has to spent on something that outlasts it.
I started coaching ambitious working professionals meet, date and attract their dream girl and guy, expand their dating opportunities, go on more dates and ultimately feel more in control of their dating and relationship lives.
While hanging out with a couple of guys in the pick up artist community, I found out that many of the guys are taking the un-informed approach towards attracting women. That’s because most of them are applying what they read and hear on Western media such as Youtube and books like ‘The Game’. Singapore dating culture has its nuances its little quirks, and unfortunately, most of the strategies do not work.
Secondly, in the pick up artist community, meeting women is often seen as a shady activity where you hang out with fellow pick up artists and go out ‘sarging’ on girls. There’s often an anti-social notion around it.
What’s the point of isolating the rest of the world in the process of getting good at girls?
It doesn’t have to be this way, furthermore, I don’t promote such philosophies. If you’re going to treat everyone else like a robot, or an object, then, needless to say, you’re going to numb yourself up to the world. You’re merely objectifying your emotional lives. Thus, I went on a mission to build a realistic, healthy community around dating and relationships.
Over the last couple of years, I worked closely with ambitious working professionals, executives, to go from rock bottom confidence to countless dates, using the exact system that I use to go from a heartbroken, depressed pre-enlistee, to someone who is able take a flight to a new country and be able to meet, date and attract, beautiful and intelligent women.
I also understand the cultural issues that a Singaporean grows up with: parents, degrees, paper chase, money chase. I’ll share with you my unique experiences and years of research that has worked for me in both Singapore and Western cultures.
Get High Quality Dates
- The Body Language Magic Bullet: Becoming The Silverback Gorilla
- Mindset: She Earns my Attention and Not to Other Way Round
- Bonus Tip: How to Make Your Voice Slow and Powerful to Capture her Attention
I also send updates on exact line by line scripts and strategies to help you get your dream girl. I never spam. Simply subscribe, put in your email and I’ll send you a copy.
How Does Your Resources Differ?
Firstly, the advice I put out on this site is backed up by decades of psychological research and I don’t make claims that can’t be backed up by data. You’ll find multiple references to psychology, with citations, throughout my blog. You can check out psychologically researched guide on how to attract women. I don’t write advice that I don’t use in may own life, or haven’t tested. I write my first-hand experiences on relationships, sex, and life in general. Here, you can read about my failures and my successes.
Let me ask you, how many people sign up for expensive bootcamps, go home, come back a year later with nothing much to show in their life? Well, that’s the majority. I don’t sit in classrooms debating theory. I am about permanent change and results. So the question is this: how can you get real world results in your life? It’s not paying thousands of dollars for motivational talks. It’s done through understanding your own psychology. Understanding the science of human behaviour, backed up by decades and decades of research.
The pick up artist movement started in Westernized cultures. The strategies promoted in Western cultures are not going to work in a traditional Asian society like Singapore. You see guys starting out with this going for crazy spins and crazy approaches. Whilst this is great for Youtube, it’s not sustainable. It also paints an unrealistic picture on how social interactions actually work.
Marcus Social is a dating advice resource that is validated by psychological research and grounded in practicality. Our site also addresses the general themes of dating, sex, and relationships but also the nuances dating in Asian culture.
Coaching is beneficial when there are realistic expectations and information. I adopt psychological researched concepts that differ from the run of the mill concepts and material.
Secondly, during my in-person coaching programs. I offer unlimited demonstrations. How many coaches out there can walk the talk?
How Would You Summarize Your Philosophy?
1) The idea of self-improvement stems from the idea that you’re dissatisfied with certain circumstances in your life. However, there’s a problem there. How can you ever feel ‘enough’, if you’re always trying to improve yourself? Isn’t that the point of self development: to feel enough? Here’s my take on things: If you’re taking action in any form or manner, you are already enough, you are OKAY.
2) You’re here for the real dating advice, not overpriced seminars. You may get rejected. Your friends may hate you cause you decide to do something with your life. Whilst the majority of dating advice out there claims you can you get your dream girl without facing any rejection. I’ll help make rejection work for you. Rejection and pain, negative emotions are part and parcel of growth. They can even be useful and helpful to an extent. The point here isn’t to deny, nor suppress negative emotions, but to accept them, and eventually, understand how to use them it in our lives.
You see. The more you try, the more you come off as a try hard. The more you try to be attractive, the needy you become. The more you try to be cool, the more you’re going to come off as un-cool. The more you resist, the more anxious you get. The more you ‘try to be positive’, the more you feel shity about yourself.
The more you fear rejection, the more you get rejected.
3) Stop memorizing lines and techniques. Learn how to connect emotionally with yourself and others. Pursue girls from a point of vulnerability, courage and boldness. Become the best version of yourself. Humble yourself to the world. If you’re not failing, you’re not doing it right. Failure and rejection are inevitable, it’s how you deal with it that matters. Our greatest successes often come from our biggest failures.
The cornerstone of my philosophy is vulnerability, accountability and courage.When you’re approaching a girl, kissing a girl, holding court in conversation, these are not done as tricks. These are done through vulnerability and boldness. It’s not about the lines, the techniques or the numbers, it’s about becoming the best version of yourself.
4) You’re going to die someday. Stop living out your life determined by society, your parents and your friends. Go, do something about it.
Shout out to Joe Siegel for his awesome images. I use quite a bit of them for the blog and site.